


Buck 3.0

by JJGirl911



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-05
Updated: 2019-11-26
Packaged: 2021-01-23 12:50:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21320467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JJGirl911/pseuds/JJGirl911
Summary: Buck had enough.  He was tired of hurting those he loved, tired of getting hurt.  He had enough of Buck 2.0. It was not time to change.  Will it be a good change, he's not sure, but he is sure that he cannot go back to the way it has been.Will the team realize their mistake, will they realize before it is too late?
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley & Christopher Diaz, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Comments: 65
Kudos: 624





	1. Enough!

**Author's Note:**

> My second story, hope you enjoy!
> 
> PS - time frames might be a little off!! But again it is my story so it is just fine ;-)

Chapter 1 – Enough!

Buck could still see the anger in Eddie’s face as he closed his eyes. Knew that if it was not for the crash outside the shop, he would have felt that anger in his face. He could see that Eddie had lost it and he understood why. Again he had failed his family, had failed the people he loved. Just like his father had told him. Why he thought this time would be any different, why he thought this new family of his would care more about him than his actual family, he did not know. Did not know why he still bothered. Why he tried to get back to them, when they clearly did not want him back. He had been back at the 118 for the last two weeks and had tried everything to get even a smile out of them. But he only seemed to suck the happiness out of everyone. Whenever he would enter an area where they were happily chatting or joking things would suddenly turn so serious. He had lost another chance at a family and he was done trying to win them back.

Walking out of the firehouse that afternoon was not easy, especially as he knew that he was not coming back. He had waited for everyone to leave before he quickly packed up his locker. Taking off his name tag which he fought so hard to get back was even more heart-breaking than seeing his sister walk out the house when she left for College. Another thing taken from him. Walking out the station left him with a hole in his soul, he knew there was nothing left for him here. He knew that what he did, filing that lawsuit, was wrong and had hurt the people he loved, that he had so much to make up for. But if they were not willing to forgive him, if they were not willing to give him a second chance then there was nothing left to fight for. He was tired and just done with everything. He should have taken the pay-out, then he would at least have something to show for the pain he had gone through and could have left it for them so that they at least had something to remember him by. Getting into his truck he give one final look in the rear-view mirror and drove off tears blurring his vision. He just had enough.

9-1-1-9-1-1-9-1-1-9-1-1

Bobby kept looking at the door, waiting for the last of his team to arrive. If there was one thing that he was certain about was that Buck had been early every shift since his return and for him not to be here 20 minutes in the shift was unusual. He kept sending glances towards the remainder of his team, and found all of them doing the exact same thing. It felt like they all waited for the weight to be lifted from their shoulders. They had been giving Buck the cold shoulder since his return and although he might have deserved it for what he had put them through, this had been going on too long. He, as their leader, had been dragging this out too long. They were all following his example. Taking a deep breath he picked up his phone dialling a once familiar number. “The number you have dialled does not exists.” The automated reply made his heart coil.

“Has any one phoned Buck recently?” Bobby asked as he looked at his call history. The last call he had made to Buck’s phone had been just before the tsunami. How had he not phoned him since then? That would explain the none-existing number, he most probably would have changed his phone after the tsunami.

He looked up at three equally puzzled faces. Hen being the first to speak, “Had not phoned him or messaged him since before the tsunami. How had I not realized that I have not spoken to him over the phone for so long?” Her voice was filled with shock. “I kept on telling him that the lawsuit kept us from having contact with him, but I have we actually been in contact with him before then?”

Chimney looked down at his hand still scrolling through the messages, “Last message I send him personally was just after the bombing. I kept on getting updates from Maddie, but I have not actually sent him a message from myself. Did he get a new phone?”

Eddie had stopped at his messages to and from Buck, his eyes actually scanning up the history. And a chill went down his spine. Most of the older messages started with Buck asking how Chris was doing or if they needed anything. But the last few made his heart stop, how had he missed these.

10 Oct 2019 @ 05:37 – Eddie: Hi Kid. My dad’s still asleep and I wanted to know if we could chat.

That was just after the lawsuit was filed. There were other shorter one’s after that. Some just a little emoji.

15 Oct 2019 @ 05:23 – Eddie: Had a great time at the party like you said. Thx for the call

After the party he went to, the day after Eddie had spent the night in jail.

23 Oct 2019 @ 03:16 – Eddie: Had a bad dream

He could not recall waking up for this one. Had there been others?

2 Nov 2019 @ 05:43 – Eddie: Think dad’s mad at me and he’s been coming home hurt

That was the day after Buck had started again and the first night he had gone to the fight club. He could feel his blood freeze, had Christopher been aware of all of the fighting?

He kept on going through the messages, it seemed like a one sided conversation. Only a short message from his phone to Buck’s but no reply. Going out of his message history he went to his actual call history to the same dates, and there it was, a call from Buck after each and every message. His eyes filled with tears, the 1st call actually lasted over 15 minutes. A few shorter ones after that, the next longer one was after the party message, which lasted over 10 minutes. Every single day there was a call from Buck. The one on the 23rd October lasted for over 70 minutes. Then the last one was yesterday evening. He thought back to last night, looking at the time, realizing that it would have been when they just arrived home and he had gone to shower. He could not believe that he had not realized that Chris was getting all these calls from Buck. Had he been so caught up in his own head that he had not been aware of what was going on in his own son’s life?

Bobby kept his eyes on the younger man, seeing the emotion playing through them, “Eddie?” He questioned softly.

Eddie looked up tears making their way down his face, his voice broken, “I fucked up.”


	2. Father and Son

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the messages and Kudos!!
> 
> Spanish was looked up on Google translate, so apologies if it is not totally correct.
> 
> Hope you enjoy the next chapter.

Chapter 2 – Father and son

Eddie looked over at Christopher as he entered the house, he was sitting in front of the TV watching cartoons. He really looked happy. Standing at the door he could not keep his thoughts running to the person that had put his son in this good mood, Buck. It had been such a long time since he looked so happy, and he felt that he had failed as a father. Even with all the support of his Abuela and the team it had been a difficult time. Christopher has always been very good at reading any situation and he could feel people’s moods quicker than any other child he had ever known. This made it difficult for him to keep anything secret from him. Keeping in mind the texts that went between Christopher and Buck, Eddie had stopped his street fighting immediately, realizing that Christopher had known there was something going on had made him run cold. Maybe it was not only because of Christopher, but Eddie’s timing on those feelings were totally off, he had missed his chance there. Christopher though, was very upset about that and some days Eddie thinks that he is still not over the whole thing. His good natured child had learned the hard way that people can disappoint you and break your heart and that had made him a little more sensitive and he had become a little more emotional and weary of other people. He so wished that he could turn the clock back.

Taking a deep breath hoping that he will not ruin his son’s good mood he sat down next to him wrapping him in a hug, “Mi hijo, did you have a good day?”

Christopher smiled up at him and Eddie could see the answer in his eyes, “Yes, we spent most of it at the park. Buck packed us a picnic basket and we fed the ducks and the birds.”

“That’s nice.” It was getting warmer after the winter months and today especially had been such a beautiful sunny day, how he wished that he could have been part of that little picture.

“I played with this big dog, bigger than me,” Christopher stretched his arms out wide, excitement clear in his voice, “I could almost ride him like a pony. Buck said that one day when he is grown up and buys a big house, he is going to get one and I can play with him whenever I wanted.” Christopher’s giggle stirred something in his gut, “I didn’t want to say anything, but I think that Buck is already grown up, he just acts like he is still a child when he is with me.”

Eddie laughed at that, that was definitely the full description of Buck, “Yea buddy I think so too.” He was burning to ask something important, but he really did not want to spoil their moment. Closing his eyes he held his son a little closer. “Desearía haber estado allí” he whispered softly as he kissed Christopher’s head.

“Me too,” Eddie sobered at the soft acknowledgement.

“Did you understand?” Again looking down at his boy and seeing the sudden sadness in his eyes, he took in a deep breath, “of course you do, you are learning from your Abuela.” 

“Yes, she said that it is important to know where my roots are,” lifting his head to look up at his dad he gave him a shy smile, “said that I will miss a lot of what you actually feel if I did not learn the language you use to express your emotions in.” 

“She should not have said that,” Eddie felt a little betrayed by his Abuela, but knew that she was not wrong, “I’m sorry if I do.”

“Do what?” Christopher looked up at his dad, eyes big.

“Keep my emotions from you,” Eddie felt the tears built up in his eyes, “you should always know that I love you and that I will do everything I can to make you happy and to keep you safe from any harm.”

“I know, Daddy. And I love you too.” Christopher pushed his head under Eddie’s chin, squeezing him tight. “I’m sorry that I have been angry at you,” his voice was broken as he spoke. “Buck told me that I should not be angry, that you were just keeping me from getting hurt.” He sniffed a little as he spoke even more quietly, “But I felt that you were unfair to keep my Buck from me, I wanted so much to see him and speak to him and you just did not want to.”

“I’m sorry,” Eddie felt like a total failure.

“I know, and Buck explained that there were things that I did not know about and that was not your fault. He told me everything that had happened and said that you were hurting too and that he was the reason for that. He said I should be angry at him and not you. That he was the reason that you were feeling so upset. That he had made everyone angry and sad.” Christopher was looking a little upset himself now. “He said that he will understand if I did not want to see him again or if you did not want me to see him.” He was quite for what seemed like a long time, just sitting within the warmth of his dad’s embrace.

Eddie kept on playing the last conversation with Buck through his mind. Knew that he had said some harsh things to Buck and Buck had not said anything to defend himself, just accepted the cruel words as if he thought he had deserved them. And when he had said it, Eddie had felt that Buck deserved it. The fact that Buck just took each punch was not satisfying, he wanted him to fight back, wanted him to get angry. But through it all Buck had just kept quiet, as if he had given up, accepting whatever fate had to throw his way. The only time he actually spoke during the whole telephonic conversation was in the beginning when he ask if Eddie would allow him to see Christopher. His soft sigh at the end of Eddie’s outburst and the defeated, “You could have just said no,” had thrown Eddie totally. In the almost two years he had known Buck he had never sounded so crushed. It made Eddie double take and before Buck ended the call he had said a quick “Yes.” He had heard the sharp inhale on the other side of the phone and then Buck had asked if he could pick him up on Thursday after school, knowing full well that Eddie would be at work.

“Dad,” Christopher’s voice brought his thoughts back.

“Yea,” he looked down in the big brown eyes.

“He did not say it, but I think he misses you very much,” Christopher smiled, “I told him that you missed him and he should come back.”

“You did?”

“Yea, but he just smiled and said that he could not. That he was not the same person anymore.” Shaking his head he pulled away from his dad, “I don’t believe him. He was still the same with me. Maybe if we got him to come and visit us more often he will realize that he still belongs here, with us.”

Eddie hugged Christopher close to him again, “It has taken him over six months to reach out, let’s not scare him off again. We will wait for him to come to us.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translation:
> 
> Desearía haber estado allí - I wish I had been there


	3. Broken Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Again your comments is my bread and butter!!

Chapter 3 – Broken Family

Bobby kept an eye on his team as he worked on their meal. It had been a long time since it really felt like a family within the group. Yes they were still very close but there was something missing. Someone missing. Buck had been gone for over 6 months now and they still had no idea where he was. After the realization that none of them had actually kept in contact with Buck even before the lawsuit, they had all drove to Buck’s apartment to find him and bring him “back”. Even if he had been back for just over two weeks after the lawsuit but they had neglected to welcome him back and that was about to change. They needed him to know how sorry they were, and had to apologize. But his apartment was empty, furniture covered with plastic, not even the smallest indication that Buck had lived there. Chimney had immediately phoned Maddie to find out but even she was not aware of anything that had happened in the last 24 hours and just as shocked as them to know that Buck had up and left. 

And now here they were 6 months later still with no idea as to what had happened to their friend. Maddie was notably upset with them and heartbroken that he brother had left so suddenly and so completely. Nothing was the same, they had called back Bosco for the first month as she still did not have a permanent place but she had not stayed long, going back to her previous unit after it was re-opened. Now they had someone filling in, however it never lasted long. Bobby knew that he had to replace Buck at some point but no one could live up to their expectations, no one was Buck. Plain and simple. 

They had a quiet day so far, only one call which only needed Hen and Chimney. Eddie and he had been left doing some odd paperwork and spending a bit of time in the gym. He could feel that Eddie had something on his mind, something that he did not know how to bring up but he did not want to push him into talking. Feeling that the younger man would do so if he felt ready. Looking over to the couch where Eddie was currently on his phone he wondered if he maybe should ask Hen if she would be able get him to open up, she had a way with the boys at the firehouse. Maybe after dinner he will ask her to just chat to Eddie. 

“Dinner’s ready,” Bobby called and watch the three of them make their way slowly to the table. He made lasagne, with a salad and some bread rolls. It was always a winner and they could easily warm it back up if they were called out. 

Hen and Chimney immediately filled their plates and sat down to enjoy the meal. Eddie looked a little reserved, maybe a little nostalgic. He plated some of the lasagne and then started to play with his food, as a teenager would do if he was forced to sit through a meal he did not want to. “You gonna eat that or just play around with it all night.” Chimney innocently asked trying to lighten the mood. 

Eddie looked up at them, his eyes wandering from each of them and then back to the plate of food, “Was always Buck’s favorite.” He voice a little longingly. It caused all three of them to sigh and lose their appetite. They kept looking at him as his eyes remained on the food, a sense of regret filling the silence in the room. “Christopher saw him yesterday.”

Bobby’s shot up at the quiet admission, Chimney actually dropped his fork and Hen took in a sharp breath of shock. “What?” The question echoed between the three of them. Bobby was the first to recover and looked seriously at Eddie, “And you did not think to tell us? When did he contact you, we could have all gone to meet him. Is he ok?”

Eddie looked up, “I was so shocked when I heard his voice. First thing I though was what the hell! After 6 months all I get is a ‘Hi Eddie, Buck here. I wanted to know if I can see Christopher?’” Shaking his head he absentmindedly started playing with his food again.

Bobby gave a knowing sigh as he sat back and watched Eddie, “And you lost your cool with him?”

Giving a sad smile Eddie nodded, “I have gone through so many conversations in my head as to how I will apologize and grovel if I ever hear from him again. But that few out the window within the first second after the question. It was like my brain was saying one thing and my heart was shouting something totally different.” He looked at Bobby hoping that he would understand, “And through my whole fallout he remained silent, did not defend himself. Did not argue with me just took my verbal beating without a word.” Eddie could feel the tears in his eyes, “I’ve never felt so mortified before. I could hear the hurt and the loneliness in his voice. I just wanted to reach through that phone and hold him. He said I could just say no, that he would not bother me again, but I knew that if I did that I will most definitely never see him again. So I told him yes, he could see Christopher. We arranged for him to pick Christopher up from the school and then he would have him back at my house by the time I got off from work.” 

“That was why you were so distracted yesterday,” Hen spoke for the first time, giving his hand a tender squeeze. 

“I wanted to take the day off, wanted to sit and wait outside of Christopher’s school and see him for myself.” Eddie gave a sad smile, “But I knew that if I did that he would not be happy, that he will leave and never come back. And as much as I have missed him and we have missed him, I knew that Christopher missed him so much more.” A lone tear made its way down his face, “And I could not do that to my little mijo, he had suffered enough from my side. That is also the reason I could not tell you guys, because as soon as you knew, I know that you all would have wanted to see him too.” He looked at Chimney, “And I knew that you would have told Maddie and she would have been there as well.” He took a deep breath, “For once in my life I had to think of what Buck wanted and needed and not what we wanted.”

They all had tears in their eyes, as Bobby smiled at him, “You are right, we would have all been there at the school waiting for him and pushing him into something he might not be ready for.” The admission hung in the silence for a little.

“What did Christopher say?” Hen asked softly, “Will Buck be coming to see him again?”

“We will have to wait and see, but if he does phone I’m not going to push him.” Eddie sat back a little defeated. “Christopher told him that we missed him and that he should come back. But Buck just said that it was not possible, that he had changed.”

“I agree, we cannot push him, let him connect with Christopher again and we take it from there.” Bobby looked at the family around the table, “Even if it takes a bit of time, we will get our family back together.”


	4. Saying Goodbye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again thank you for the feedback, Hope you still enjoying it.

Chapter 4 – Saying goodbye

Six months ago……

As Buck closed the door to his apartment he felt the last part of his heart breaking. He was truly alone now. He knew he could go to Maddie, that she would understand. However he could not ask her to give up her happiness for his own. She had been on the receiving end of so much heartache in the past that she was due some happiness and settling her with his problems will drive a wedge between her and Chim and he could not be responsible for that. He had seen the strain she had been taking having to choose between him and Chim through the lawsuit and being family he knew that if push came to shove she would choose him in a heartbeat. Chim was good for her and Buck was not going to take that away from her anytime soon. He knew that it was going to be difficult but he was stronger than they thought, this was just one more step in life. One more chapter that he had to close off in the story book that was BUCK. 

Stepping up to the Supers door he knocked softly, and as Mr Brown opened the door he almost held back the key, but then pushed through the last of his anxiety. “Evening Mr Brown, I’m just dropping of the key. I have paid the rent for the next three months and will let you know before the end of that regarding my plans forward.”

The older man gave a soft nod, “We are sad to see you leaving, and so suddenly.”

“Things just fell in place sooner than I thought,” Buck lied easily. “At this time I don’t have a forwarding address if any mail comes in would you mind just keeping it safe for me until I have somewhere that you can mail it to.”

“Off course son, you just say the word and I will send it through,” he took the key from Buck, “Can you tell me where you are heading off to?”

Smiling Buck shook his head, “Not at this stage, I’m still seeing where things leads me.” 

“Well you keep in touch and let me know what the plan is with the apartment.” 

“Sure, can I just ask one more thing?” Buck asked as he was about to leave, “I’m not sure if my team will come looking for me, but if they do, will you ask them to leave the copies of the key with you. In our line of work we always share the copies and I did not get the opportunity to ask them to return their keys.”

“No problem, though it might be best then just to change the locks?”

“Yea that might actually be even better, if you would not mind. I will make a payment for that to your account as soon as I have settled.” Buck said a final goodbye and then he left the building not looking back.

It was already after 21:00 when he drove over the LA borderline, but he had to get as far away from the city as possible, he drove for almost two and a half hours finally deciding to crash somewhere in Santa Maria before he fell asleep behind the steering wheel. Finding a place was not too difficult and he paid for two nights with cash, which he had withdrawn before he left LA. Having a feeling that Athena might just do a credit card check to see where he was off to. Suddenly grateful that his bank allowed him to update his daily limit with the banking app. He had withdrawn almost 10 thousand dollars, hoping that it will keep him at least until they stopped looking for him. 

Lying in the hotel that night he knew that even though he was bone-tired sleep would not come easy for him. He took out the new sim-card he had purchased after he had cancelled and paid up his previous contract and then inserted it into his phone. The image of Christopher greeting him as he switched his phone back on. He smiled sadly at the picture and then remembered his last conversation with the little guy just before he had cancelled the number. 

~~~~  
“Hi Christopher, can you talk?” Buck was happy when the little guy picked up the phone instead of his dad. He had taken the chance hoping that Eddie would be in the shower as per his normal routine. 

“Hi Buck, yes Dad’s in the shower.” Christopher said looking towards the hallway. “You ok? You sound sad.”

“I’m ok superman,” Buck smiled at the worry in the little boys voice, “I just wanted to phone you to say that I love you and I miss you.”

“I miss you too.” There was a heavy silence for a few seconds before Christopher felt the first tear run down his face, “You saying goodbye?” His voice barely audible over the line.

“You way too smart for your own good, you know that.” Buck gave a small laugh that sounded more like a sob. “I’m going to be away for a bit. I need to find myself again. Need a bit of space to sort my head out, you know.” He could not believe that he could speak so honestly to the little guy. 

“Will you come back,” sniffed as he said the words.

“I’m not sure yet,” Buck bit back a sob, tears flowing freely now. “But I’ll find a way to keep in touch little man. I have your Abuela’s number and her address, and I’ll be sure to send you some way to let you know I’m ok.”

“And Daddy? I know he is going to miss you too.”

“And I’ll miss him, and everyone just as much. But I have to go, it’s breaking my heart to stay.”

“I love you.”

“I love you to the moon and back.” Buck said softly.

“Will you stay on the line until dad’s finished? I know you don’t want to talk to him but can you talk to me till the end.”

“Definitely.” Buck smiled sadly, “How was your day......"


	5. New Beginnings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, THANK YOU for all the comments. Sorry that I'm not responding to all. But I love them!!!

Chapter 5 – New beginnings

Buck stopped in front of the training camp. After hours of research and going back and forth over telephonic conversations, he had enrolled himself into a two month training camp for soldiers to be. They had a bit of issues with his age, as most of their new “recruits” were going on to about 8 years younger than him. At the age of 27 most people was already set in their career path. Not that he now wanted to change his career but he needed to find some way to make a clean break and at the same time work on his physical strength. The fact that he was ready to go back to work was not something that he would have taken lightly and he was ready, but he knew that he was still did not have his physical strength back 100%. 

The physical training and demands the two month program will hold for him was exactly what he needed. He needed the distraction to get out of his head. To find his own equilibrium, to clear his mind and to help his heart heal. He needed to decide what he was going to do with his life. He knew he could not go back to being the selfish, immature, impulsive, attention seeking, skirt (or pants) chasing Buck 1.0. With the last two years he had settled down, become a more reliable and stable person, a one woman (man) kind of guy and there was no going back. He had learned what it was to be able to depend on a family, on the support of his friends, and he yearned for that again. With that, however, came heartache and despair and he did not know if he could go through that again. The people that he needed the most was who let him down the most and the people he loved the most seemed to be the same people that he hurt most of all. Yea Buck 2.0 needs to be buried with the past, he had to close that chapter no matter how hard it was going to be. Find a way in between, it was time to create Buck 3.0.

~~~~

The first month went by in a blur. One day melting into the next, he barely had time to sleep as it was. The instructors ruthless in making sure that they all perform to the top of their ability. Starting the process of slowly but increasing the workouts and increasing the difficulty of the workouts as their physical strength increased. There were just over 40 of them that started and along the way some had fallen to the exhaustion, but he welcomed it. Welcomed the fact that it did not give him time to think of anything or anyone outside of getting through the next grueling day. His nightmares had faded to maybe one a week, exhaustion being the best medicine. They did not have a lot of free time, only getting of half a day a week which most of the others spent on catching up with their families. He kept to himself most of the time, opening his phone and going through some of the text messages, pictures and videos that he received from Christopher through his Abuela. Buck needed to send her a big bunch of flowers to thank her for allowing Christopher to keep in touch with him, and an even bigger box of chocolates to thank her for not telling Eddie. 

He felt an intense longing for the little boy, seeing his smiling face as he browsed through the pictures. A tear escaped as he played a short video of Christopher saying how much he loved and missed him. He really missed the little guys so much.

“You doing ok?” Steve, one of the other recruits asked as he sat down next to Buck. He was one of the older recruits, at the age of 22, a collage dropout who had decided that even if his parents wanted him to become a lawyer that it was not for him. So he was going to join the Army. 

Buck looked up and smiled at the younger man, “Yea, just thinking of time past.” Buck had kept to himself most of the time, never really mixing with the others. That however, did not mean that he was not part of the team, he was one of the stronger leaders within the now only 24 that has remained. Most of the time taking charge of the group he was assigned to. He appreciated the fact that they did not remain in one specific group but rotated through different smaller groups, ensuring that the learned how to work with different people. Adjusting to whatever role you are given. He had been with Steve in a few of the groups challenges and he was one of the guys that Buck actually liked. 

Steve stood out above the other recruits, he was taller than Buck with about two inches had flaming red hair and the greenest eyes that Buck had ever seen. If he knew that Steve was into guys he would have no problem falling for him, or at least maybe Buck 1.0 would have no problem falling for him. Sitting and looking at the man next to him, he wondered if he might have a type. Red hair and green eyes. Just like Abby. His phone buzzed and it brought him back from his musings. Looking down he smiled seeing a text from Christopher. It was as if the little boy knew to interrupt his thoughts at that specific moment. 

Chris: Hi Buck, passed my maths exams with an A. Dad’s just come past Abuela to pick up something and I quickly wanted to let you know. LOVE YOU!!!

Buck smiled at the text knowing that he would not be able to respond now as Eddie most probably will be around and could catch Christopher on the phone. 

“Now that is a better look on you,” Steve said as he moved a little closer to Buck.

Buck was a little startled as he looked up right into Steve’s eyes, “Sorry?”

“The smile,” Steve smiled seductively, and Buck realized that he was definitely being hit on. 

“Oh, thanks.” Buck felt himself blush slightly, now how to let him down easily? 

“I was wondering, if you did not have plans for tonight we could,” Steve started a little unsure of himself the longer he talked, “you know, go out and grab something to eat.”

Buck took in a deep breath, “Look, not to shoot you down or anything, but I’m not interested in anything right now.”

Steve looked a little disappointed but quickly recovered, “No strings attached, you know. Just some good pizza and a cold beer. Nothing more.” He subtly moved a little further away from Buck, “It’s just that I have not seen anyone visiting you and it is the fourth weekend in a row that you have been the only one remaining at the base when everyone else had been going out.”

“Oh,” again Buck thought he got it wrong, “I’m sorry, thought you were,” he swallowed hard, “you know hitting on to me.” 

“Oh yea, I totally was,” Steve gave him a wink, “but if you are not ready, I would really just like to see you smile a bit more. You really seem so stressed out and serious, and I have been trying to see if I could get you to smile like you just did,” he indicated to the phone.

“Yea, little man could always make me smile.” Buck looked fondly at the text again.

“Is he with his mom?”

Switching of the phone Buck leaned back against the couch, “No with his dad, but that is something I’m here to forget.” He smiled, and then then slapped his hand on Steve’s knee, “So you were saying something about paying for pizza and beer?”


	6. Captain, oh my Captain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for the delayed posting - RL and all!!
> 
> Hope you enjoy - A little longer than the others though.

Chapter 6 – Captain, oh my Captain

Bobby hated coming to these seminars, hated it with a passion. He had more pressing work to be done at the firehouse and he would much rather be out with his team saving people. Unfortunately, as captain he was forced to attend them. At least it gave him time to meet up with a few of the other captains he had not seen in a long time. After the long lectures and talks they had to attend, it was great to catch up to what had been going on in the other firehouses. 

Walking into the pub, where most of the guys normally hanged out he recognized the captain form the Engine 75, Daniel Stevens, one of the first that really made him feel welcome when he attended the first seminar when he joined the LAFD. He had not spoken to him in such a long time and felt bad for not keeping in touch. They always left these seminars with the promise of keeping in touch and maybe getting together for a barbeque but it never realized. However there had been the odd phone call here and there. Daniel having missed the last seminar as he was buys with some sort of action against him. He was still one of the old school captains, the not so by the book type of leader. He gave free reign to his squad as long as the job gets done. One of the guys that has always been in the hot spot for some reason or the other. Last year it was because of his squad actually moved an LAPD patrol car by pushing it with the fire truck because it was in the way of the fire hydrant. Though it was not anything major, news spread through the ranks of the LAFD faster than some of the wild fires they fight. All said and done Daniel stood by his men, took the punishment from the higher ups and ensure that those under his command were cleared.

“Hey Daniel,” Bobby greeted as he took up the seat next to him at the bar and gave I quick nod to the bartender, “draft please.” 

“Bobby, ain’t you a sight for sore eyes.” Daniel extended his hand in greeting. “It’s been some time.”

“Yea, so how things at the 75th.”

“Not as excited as at the 118th as I hear.” Daniel smiled, “Seems that you have had a crazy time, since I’ve seen you last.” Taking a sip of his scotch he shook his head, “You should not take a page of this old guy’s handbook. One of these days I will not have the rep of being the most hot-headed captain around.”

Bobby thanked the bartender as his drink was placed in front of him, then took a long swig of the beer, contemplating his answer. It had been a long year, and so much has happened, “Definitely been a very long year, but I believe me, think that one still goes to you, believe you just got a new recruit that is quite the daredevil.”

“Yea, Sweets. Well that’s actually why I’m glad that I ran into you.” He smiled a little uneasy, “He is keeping Nicky’s spot at the moment, and I had a chat with Nicky two days ago. He’s looking to make a change when he comes back in about a month, needs to be a little closer to home and he thought I could chat to you, see if he could fill the empty spot in your house. We are happy with Sweets, been a good fit with the boys.”

Shaking his head, Bobby was quick to stop Daniel, “It’s Buck’s spot, I haven’t had the heart to fill it, don’t know if I will ever.”

“I understand, have you thought of letting Buck know his space is still open?” Daniel asked a little intrigued.

“I wish we had a way of contacting him.”

“He has no contact with you, not even through his sister? Or the Diaz boy?” Daniel sounded quite knowledgeable when it came to his team and Bobby frowned at him. “Hey I hear things,” Daniel shrugged. “Just saying, you leave it too long, some other captain’s going to scoop him up without a second though.” He downed the last of his scotch, “Look, think about it and let me know. I’ll see you around.”

Bobby felt a little puzzled after the whole conversation. It almost felt like Daniel had known a lot more about the 118 as would have been normal, yes things spread like wild fire around the firehouses but it seemed like he had some inside information. Especially mention the Diaz boy? Did he mean Eddie or Christopher? He looked at the door thinking maybe he needed to chat a little more with Daniel, but he was gone. He might just need to bring it up with the next dinner.

~~~

Two days passed the seminar and on the way to their next call, Eddie heard that the truck 75 was called to the same fire. Thoughts of his conversation with Daniel drifted to his mind and the thought it might just be the opportunity he needed to actually chat with Daniel again, maybe invite them over for dinner after the call. The fire was in the industrial part and so far there were three of the warehouses on fire. The first warehouse was filled with highly flammable liquids and had caused the two adjacent warehouses to catch on. There were 6 trucks on scene and the 118th was the last to arrive, having just come from another call. 

Taking in the situation, Bobby immediately went over to Daniel as they were first on scene. “Where do you need us?”

Daniel looked apprehensive seeing him but equally grateful at the additional help, “Need someone to assist with the injured, already have three ambulances that has left with the major injuries, but there are a few minor injuries needing looking at.” Without being told Hen and Chimney grabbed their gear and joined the other paramedics assessing the numerous people with minor burns and smoke inhalation. “Could also use another team on the warehouse on the left, we think there might still be some people in there, it has a few more offices and we not sure if anyone might be trapped.” 

Bobby turned to Eddie and their temp for the week, Sonny, and they nodded, “Centre warehouse clear?” Bobby asked seeing as the building is showing signs of collapse.

“My team is in there,” the stress in Daniel’s voice was clear, “Got two men trapped just after the explosion, team’s working on getting them out.”

“They need any help?”

“Can’t have more people in there, it’s gonna come down in the next bit so they have to start clearing.” He picked up his Radio, “Truck 75 status?”

“We about done Cap,” Sam’s tired voice filled them in, “Sweets and I are almost at the entrance and Greg and Lee is hot on our heels.” 

“Good Sam, we need to clear out, building’s going down.”

“Got it Cap,” Sam spoke into his coms and then turned to see his other team mates following. He smiled, they really worked well as a team and having Sweets with them just added another bit of spark. 

“Help!”

All four men halted as they heard the call from above them, “Shit,” Sam cursed as he saw someone moving in the offices just above the warehouse, “How did we miss him?”

“Not sure, Sam,” Greg looked over to Sam.

“I’ll get him,” Sweets was already handing his current charge over to Sam.

“No way Sweets, it’s too dangerous, we need to get out.” Sam knew that he was just wasting his breath.

“Go, I’ll be out in no time.” Without further discussion Sweets took off towards the stairway that was hanging by a tread. “Meet you at the window,” he shouted over the roar in the building, then pointed towards a window at the far side of the building, “easiest way out.”

“Fuck,” Greg looked a Sam, “do I need to follow?”

“No let’s get out,” he had already assessed the situation and them staying here will not help, there was a window to the far side at the top and the four months spent with Sweets he knew what was going through that window and they had to make sure they were on the outside to help.

Running from the building both Sam and Lee handed over the two injured men and made a b-line for the truck getting the air mattress out. 

Captain Stevens following his team, “Where the hell is Sweets?” Bobby could see the stress in his shoulders, knows it himself. 

“There was someone else trapped at the first floor office, don’t know how we missed him,” Sam spoke as the continued towards the building again. The Air mattress was deployed quickly and the stood back and waited.

“Sweets come in,” Daniel’s voice echoed over the coms, but no reply. Shaking his head he looked at the rest of his team, all of them ready to run in if needed. “Dammit Sweets, report!” 

More of the first responders started making their way towards the group, Eddie and Sonny also coming from the cleared warehouse. Bobby nodded to them in acknowledgment, and pointing towards the truck, “Get some foam on that fire, lets’ see if we can starve it. Give their guy a bit of time.” Eddie nodded and made his way to the truck.

“Sweets, report!” Daniel was now clearly worried. “Fuck Buckley if you don’t report now I will have your ass!”


	7. Sweets - AKA Buck 3.0

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is having a life of its own. Hope you still enjoying it.
> 
> Short little chapter to explain "Sweets"

Chapter 7 – Sweets - AKA Buck 3.0

~~~Four months ago~~~

Buck walked into the 75th station, just a little apprehensive. The station was not his first choice, not really being so far away from the 118 as he would have liked. But after his meeting with the Chief he was not given a lot of choices. The 75th was currently one man short and seeing as he did not want his old spot back at the 118th this was it or nothing. He had taken it immediately, knowing that he loved LA and did not see himself anywhere else, and thinking back to the time he had been at the 118th he could not remember any call that they had that involved the 75th. All he knew was that the Captain was old school and that he stuck his neck out for any under his command. 

Walking towards the offices he felt a few heads turn his way, knocking on the door that said “Captain Stevens” he waited for the call to come in. He took in the man behind the desk, he looked a little older than Bobby, maybe 5 years or more. His greying hair did nothing to hide the fact that he was getting on in years. “Morning Captain Stevens, Even Buckley reporting for duty.”

“Take a seat, Evan.” Daniel looked up from his file and extended his hand.

“Thanks,” Buck shook it firmly and then sat down across from Daniel.

“See you have been through quite a year,” he remarked as he paged through some of the reports in Buck’s extensive file.

“Yea, been a bit of a doozie.” Buck said looking down.

Daniel looked directly at Buck and Buck knew that he was being assessed, “You seem to be over the worse, and I can see that you are looking quite well. The two months off did you some good.”

“Training camp was quite the experience, got my physical strength up to 100%. Can’t wait to get into the field though. I enjoyed the time with them but the Army’s definitely not for me.” Buck sat up straighter, his lean muscular frame filled the chair with confidence. 

“Good to know.” He closed the file and then folded his arms over it leaning forward, “Ok, so this is a new beginning so to speak for you. I’ve had a few guys coming through my station looking for a new beginning and I get that. We will not hold any of this,” he pointed to the file, but Buck knew that it was directed specifically to the lawsuit, even if it was not said out loud, “against you. I have been at this a long time and I can see the fire in you. Can see that this is not only a job for you but a passion, something that is in your blood and that must have been the reason you fought so hard to get back to it.” Standing up he started to make his way around the table, “we all have our demons, but I’m sure you will be able to deal with them as you go on. Follow me,” he said opening the door, “let me introduce you to the team. The Chief said that you will be me provisionally for the next 3 months, until Nicky gets back to full strength. We will take things form there, as you know yourself, an injury can take a left turn and before you know it you are off for most of the year.”

Buck nodded and found himself really liking his new Captain, he looked like someone that was to the point and did not pull any punches. Saying things as they were. He could get use to this. They walked into the break-room, which looked totally different from what he was used to. They had a kitchen, but definitely not as well stocked as Bobby’s. There were no dining table, nor any chairs around the island in the kitchen, very minimally furnished. 

The alarms sounded and everyone around him started making their way to the tuck, “Ok seems you will get introduced in the truck, we’ve been expecting you so you gear is ready. Locker is the first to the left, we’ll add your name soonest.” 

Within minutes the truck was on it’s way. “Name is Sam,” the strong Texan drawl pulled Buck looked at the 40-year-old man sitting across from him. He had dark hair, dark complexion with brown eyes, everything shouted very ordinary type of guy. 

“Even Buckley,” Buck extended his hand. 

“Hi Evan,” Sam shook his hand, “I’m team lead when in the field, the clown next to you is Lee, our rookie. Behind the wheel is Greg, you will meet Sarah and Joan, our paramedics when we get to the scene. Welcome to the 75th.”

Daniel kept an eye on the team at the back as they introduced themselves. “Ok guys, call is at a local candy factory, owner got caught in the gears of the conveyer belt…”

~~~

Buck could not hold his laughter as he stood in front of his locker, “Sweets” was written on the white tape across his locker. Sam tapped him on his shoulder, “Thought you would like it, seeing as to you wanting a new start and all.” 

“Yea it was unanimous, seeing you coated in chocolate yesterday there was nothing other we could come up with.” Sarah tried to contain her snigger as she spoke. “And the old lady’s face when she saw you, oh gosh, I thought I was going to break down. It almost looked like she was about to eat you up.”

“Yea, yea, and then she went “Oh Sweets Mary mother God”, Joan hiccupped with laughter. 

Taking in the laughter surrounding him, Buck oddly felt comfortable between them, not totally at home but comfortable. Then he allowed the smiled to spread over his face, yes this will be a new beginning, “Sweets,” he let the name slip past his lips, causing the whole group into fits of laughter again. Then slowly to himself he whispered, “aka Buck 3.0”.


	8. Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, so sorry for the delay. This is a short chapter

Chapter 8 – Reunion

….“Sweets, report!” Daniel was now clearly worried. “Fuck Buckley if you don’t report now I will have your ass!”

Bobby turned at the frantic call from Daniel, frozen when he heard the name Buckley. He looked from Daniel towards Eddie and then Hen and Chimney, they all had the same expression of shock on their faces. “Evan Buckley?” Bobby said the name in question looking back at Daniel, who only nodded slightly, panic still clear in his face.

Then the first explosion was heard and it rocked the ground they stood on, everyone again throwing their attention to the warehouse, seeing the back of the warehouse exploding into flames, then a second one a little bit more to the center. Eddie threw the equipment in his arms on the ground rushing towards the building, all he could think of wat that Evan was in there. He was sure that he screamed his name as he rushed forward but was stopped by Sam holding him back. “Let me go!” He struggled to break free from the hold the older man had on him.

“No use we losing you in there as well, Sweets will be fine. He’s a good fireman, he will find his way out.” Sam spoke calmly, which only infuriated Eddie even more.

“How can you be so damn calm, the whole place is gonna come down in a few minutes.” Eddie again struggled, fighting to be set free, but the older man had such a death grip on him he could barely move.

“And how do you think you’re gonna get in there and get them out in a matter of a few minutes. Let him do what he is best at!” The third explosion shook the ground and then there was a burst of glass as the top window shattered and someone jumped through. Sam let Eddie go and ran with him to the air-mattress as the body landed. 

Together with Sarah and Greg, they helped the young man to the ground, grabbing him by the fire jacket. “Oh thank god,” the man said as he felt his feet hit the ground.

“Where is Buck?” Eddie was in his face immediately.

“Who?”

“The fireman whose jacket you have on?” Eddie was about to pull the answer from him when he heard a familiar voice from above.

“Stand clear, I’m coming down.” Eddie stood back and looked up, his eyes drawn to the blond as he jumped. Buck made quick work of getting off the mattress and then started towards Sam. “We need to get back, it’s about to come down.” 

Everyone around them started making their way back towards the trucks, and within a matter of seconds the building behind them came down.

“Cutting it close again,” Joan shook her head as Buck walked towards them.

“Yea, yea, you know me, need to add a bit of drama to the calls,” Buck laughed as he looked up at her, but froze as he saw Bobby standing next to Daniel and Joan. He was totally caught off guard, not expecting to see his ex-captain.   
Bobby did a quick assessment of Buck as he started towards them. He looked good. He had picked up the weight he had lost after the whole bombing and tsunami and it seemed like he had built a bit of muscle as well. His hair was a little longer and darker than they were used to and it made him look a little older. Although he was smiling, it was a little disconcerting how much more serious he looked. Buck’s smile could light up a room, but his features now seemed a little harder, a little darker. As if he had gone through some sort of transformation. 

Buck looked from Bobby to Daniel, nervousness clear in his face as he tried to find the right words. He knew that there was always a possibility of them crossing paths with the 118 and that he would have to face them at some stage, it was LA and it was only so big. He just hoped that it would not have been so soon after the previous incident. Hoped that he would have a bit more time to process that first before it all null-and-void the last 6 months of his life. He had left to get pass all of the emotional trauma, and he had thought it worked, that he was better for it. He worked hard at closing that chapter of his life, but knew that the 118 would always be part of his life story. That with the connection to his sister and Christopher they would remain woven in the story line that was his life, but as guest starts, no longer playing an integral role. Oh boy was he wrong. Just one look at their faces and he knew that would never be possible. 

Taking a deep breath he looked straight at Bobby and the other members of the 118 that had joined Bobby, “Hi.”


End file.
